Spiritually Relegated
Tottenham and Manchester United have reached the Europa League final, but they remain in the Premier League only by the grace of God.
It was a Sunday befitting Tottenham Hotspur and Manchester United’s seasons: they each took a 2-0 L. This has been a world-historically disastrous Premier League campaign for both of them. After 36 matches, they’ve accumulated 38 and 39 points, still short of the 40 that customarily suggests safety from relegation. They occupy the two spots immediately above the drop zone.
It’s only by the grace of God — well, the grace of the three newly promoted sides, who just have not been competitive — that these two “Big Six” types aren’t fighting for their lives in this league. Tottenham have lost 20 matches, a record. United have lost 17, also a record, and boast a -11 goal difference. Spurs have lost seven of their last 10, taking five points from the last 30 available. Manchester United have taken two points from their last seven Premier League matches.
It’s Parachute Payment form, no doubt about it. These two will be contesting a European final this month and the winner will play in the Champions League next season. But in another year, with promoted teams that were vaguely competitive, they’d be at significant risk of playing Champions League from the Championship.
The Stadio podcast refers to great goals ruled out by a linesman as “Spiritually Onside.” (There are even sweatshirts.) In a related but far more malevolent formulation, I would like to declare that both Tottenham and Manchester United experienced Spiritual Relegation in the Premier League this season.
Am I enjoying all this as an Arsenal fan? Well, no. The chattering has already begun from some Spurs and United fans that if they can take the Europa League, they’ll have had a better season than Arsenal. This is exactly what Manchester United fans did last summer, of course, creating a groundswell of support for keeping Erik ten Hag.
These heady days of spring can have people thinking dreamily, but let’s not pretend these two sets of fans have enjoyed this season. A final is a great day out, a trophy is better, and a ticket to the Champions League next year is a major tonic. But these supporters have spent 90% of their days since August looking for a high ledge to walk off.
Am I bitter? Of course. Chelsea Football Club is riffing on a tag line from Arsenal’s Champions League semifinal run while celebrating victory over Djurgården, currently 14th place in the Swedish Allsvenskan. But Chelsea are at least competing for the Top Five in England. There is no comparison with what’s going on at Spurs and United.
Whoever wins that Europa League final is going to be swaggering around, though, so it’s worth writing it into the record: two clubs that consider themselves perennial contenders for the European places are 24 and 25 points off the Champions League spots. They’re 44 and 45 points behind the champions, Liverpool. West Ham, Wolves, and Everton have snuck ahead of them, while Crystal Palace and Fulham pulled away some time ago. The Cottagers are 13 points better off than their London neighbors Spurs.
If the bottom three teams are in a kind of limbo between the Prem and the Championship — the Yo-Yo League? — then United and Tottenham are bottom in spirit.⚽︎